How I Moved On From A Toxic Addiction To A Healthy Relationship | Bet On Yourself

This is the second step to liberating yourself from a toxic addiction and turning it into a healthy relationship. If you want to know how my journey started, you can check it out here so you can follow along.

I don't really support gambling and it is a bad habit by itself. However, there is a way for you to take advantage of the thrill in gambling while getting rid of another bad habit and strengthen your relationship at the same time.

When I decided to stop smoking, I made a plan with my partner. I knew it was going to be a long journey but I knew that I had to start somewhere. Thus, we made a bet. I bet on myself that I could do it but I needed someone to keep tabs and keep me accountable. I told her that I will try smoking only one stick per day. If I went over that, then I would have to pay her with something. The reward we came up with was that I will have to pay for a movie date if I went over the limit.

In the Philippines, I didn't need to buy a whole pack of cigarettes because street vendors sell them per stick. It was more expensive to buy per stick than to buy per pack but I was in control of how much I would consume per day. If I bought a pack, the longer it stayed open, the cigarettes would lose their flavor and I would smoke more because I didn't want to waste them.

This plan really worked well for me. Not only did it help me control myself, I was also spending less. However, when things go well, at some point, something bad happens. One of the best things happened in cinema and it made it worse for my addiction. Marvel started the MCU.

Because I started to become obsessed with the Marvel Cinematic Universe, I went from smoking one stick per day to smoking more than once. I made wanting to go to the movies an excuse to smoke one more stick since I was going to pay for the tickets anyway.

I did enjoy it and it was great for my relationship. That meant that my partner and I got to spend more time with each other. We had fun going to the mall and did some shopping before the movie. After each film, we had dinner some place nice. It was one of the best times in our relationship.

I started to realize that although we were having a really good time together, I was also spending a lot more. I was buying packs of cigarettes again and aside from that, I was also spending more for our dates. My partner also warned me that I was already making excuses to smoke more because I wanted to watch a movie. Aside from that, I already owed her more movies since I smoked more than the times we actually went to the cinema.

The good part about it is, now, I know that I can live with smoking one stick per day because I've done it before. Therefore, I went back to smoking once a day. This deal went on for years with still a few failures at times but mostly because there was a movie I really liked.

The next big regression was when I started working at a job that was very stressful for me. I started to smoke more than once per day again because I was very unhappy with my job. I was so grateful that my partner understood how I felt and gave me a pass. I was allowed to adjust the limit to 3 times instead of once per day. It was a very unhealthy time for me. It was also very unhealthy for our relationship because I had to work on a later shift so we would see each other very late and when we saw each other, I looked very depressed.

I decided to quit that job and find a new job. Since the new job had a very good working environment, I started to feel better. I was still smoking more than once per day but instead of three times, I cut it down to two. Eventually, it went back to one.

As I was cutting down on the number of cigarettes, I was also cutting down on the movie costs. I no longer had an excuse because the company I am working at had a very nice perk for their employees. Every quarter, employees voted for a movie they wanted to watch and the company paid a ticket for the employee with an option to pay for extra tickets if they wanted to bring other people to watch. Since I still owed my partner a lot of movies from my previous violations, I still stuck with smoking once per day.

I still had a routine but I noticed that I didn't really crave smoking anymore. I was only smoking because I only had one chance to do it in a day and I didn't want to waste that chance. Nevertheless, there were days when I'd completely forget about it and not smoke for that day.

Remember when I said my regression started during the best times of my life? Life is really has a way of bringing poetic justice. One of the worst times in my life and in human history happened to be the final step for me to completely quit smoking. The final step to my liberation from my toxic addiction was during a crisis.

If you want to get the TLDR version of this guide, you can get it for less than a pack of cigarettes here. Otherwise, I will describe the next step which is to bet on yourself on the next post.

Thanks for reading my story. I hope you have a good day and see you in the next post!